Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I understand how hurricane paths work

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

Have you or anyone you know invested in cryptocurrencies before? If so, which one did you invest in and how much profit did you make?

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I caught my neighbor leaving his 12-year-old son home alone and he has not come back in 6 hours. Should I call CPS?

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I can count

What nonsense did you hear today in India that made you laugh?

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

Why are many women so drawn or attracted to men that have been or are currently in prison and men that are involved in street life/illegal activities?

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

Scottie Scheffler Calls US Open at Oakmont 'The Hardest Golf Course...Maybe Ever' - Bleacher Report

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I have complete contempt for traitorism

Was Michael Jackson really an innocent person?

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I don’t cotton to rapists

I see through liars

What kind of lights would you like to use for your home decor?

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I actually pay taxes

What sexual experience did you have at a highway rest area?

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

How do you write lyrics for a song that resonates with listeners?

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

How can I navigate a romantic relationship as a trans person, and what are some common challenges that I might face?

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

Should I have left it alone and kept quiet? I came out as gay to my adult kids last week. Age 61 married 15 years, divorced for 20. I feel so guilty for ruining their lives by living a lie.

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I have a reading level above third grade

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I have complete contempt for fakery

I don’t buy bullshit

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I can read

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight